Florida

You honestly have to give the 16th century Spanish imperialists credit. They may not have found gold, but they found a balmy, balmy place. With beautiful foliage and wide roads, to boot. If you just add four old women, one home, and funky outfits from the 80s, then you've got better than gold.

I guess the Spaniards didn't really "find" anything. You have to give the Native Americans credit too. But the Spanish did an excellent job with the marketing: Florida. The nasal "o." The swallowed "i." It really does roll off the tongue with a fabulous Long Island flourish. The Spanish were really ahead of their times.

On the other side of the spectrum: New England Puritans. OK, let's count the reasons why they suck: 1) Puritans - 'nuff said. 2) New England winters a) cold b) no sun. 3) Narrow roads. 4) Noticeable paucity of fabulous old women in flashy blouses.

Also, my grandmother lives in Florida. And she rocks.

And yes, she does wear fabulous blouses (think Steinmart "boutique").